Notes from talk by Alex Jones

St. Pius Elementary, February 1, 2003

"Keeping Your Kids Catholic"

 

Mr. Jones was a pastor of a Pentecostal evangelical church for over 25 years. He and his congregation converted to Catholicism at the Easter Vigil in 2001. He has 3 sons in their 30's, the best 3 daughters-in-law in the world, and 7 grandchildren.

 

Mr. Jones first point was that keeping our kids in church is not a uniquely Catholic problem, but is a problem for the entire Christian church. Several factors are working against us as Christian parents. Society as a whole works against us. We live in a post-Christian era which thinks Christianity is a relic. People with unbelieving hearts are in positions of power in Hollywood, in the school systems, in the music industry. The dignity of the human person is diminished. There is secularism, even inside the Church.

As Catholics, we should be standing up before the world saying,

"LOOK ON US !!!!" as Peter and John said to the crippled man in Acts 3:4. "Silver and gold I have not, but such as I have I give unto you." This is what the Church should be saying to the world. The Church offers the TRANSFORMATION of lives. Evangelization is actively bringing souls to Jesus that they might experience His transforming Power. Today, evangelization is being replaced by mundane acts such as feeding the hungry, giving shelter, etc. These things are good and necessary, but they are charity, not evangelization. Anyone, even an unbeliever, can practice charity towards others. John Paul II has called this the "secularization of salvation". I'm sorry, I can't remember where this quote is from. It is justice without Jesus.

Western society has become very materialistic and religion is on the back burner. This is why Islam is on the rise today - they say, "Look at the West. This will NOT happen to us!"

A study was done which revealed the top 6 reasons why Catholics leave the faith.

They are:

1 - rifts with parents,

2 - hurts received within the Church, from Church authority,

3 - disagreements on the Church's teachings on sex and marriage,

4 - marriage to non-Catholics,

5 - spiritual hunger,

6 - changes since Vatican II.

The most common time people leave the Church is between the ages of 16 and 22.

Where do they go when they leave? In this order, the most common places are non-denominational churches, Pentecostal churches, Baptist and other "Bible-believing" churches, and Episcopal and Lutheran churches.

So, we've got society pulling our children, internal troubles in the Church, sexual and violent imagery abounding - all these are attacking our families. How do we keep our children? Mr. Jones then offered 3 main points.

 

1 - Work within your Church parish to develop youth ministries that are vibrant and strong.

Mr. Jones shared that as a youth, he looked around his church and saw old, bored, unhappy, grieving people. He developed the idea that he could live his life to the full and then "check in" at church when he was ready to "check out" of life. He had the idea that church was only for old people, not at all interesting for young people, that the church was really not for youth.

We must love our youth and have ministries especially for them and geared toward them. The youth is the church of today, not tomorrow only. We must insist on good, sound youth programs which do 2 things. First, they must teach the true faith. Second, they must allow the kids to experience and participate in ministry.

 

2 - Teach the faith to your children at home - in the Domestic Church.

To do this, parents must learn, know, and understand their faith and must be able to answer questions.

Deuteronomy 11:18-21 says, "Therefore, take these words of mine into your heart and soul. Bind them at your wrist as a sign, and let them be a pendant on your forehead. Teach them to your children, speaking of them at home and abroad, whether you are busy or at rest. And write them on the doorposts of your houses and on your gates, so that, as long as the heavens are above the earth, you and your children may live on in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers he would give them."

We must teach our children the meaning of the Sacraments, the meaning of the Mass, the meaning of our Faith, the meaning of the dignity of married love which will enable them to practice honorable courtship.

This involves personal formation between parent and child. The responsibility belongs to the parents to help the child find himself and to offer knowledge of Jesus, Who became a child like them.

 

3 - Live your faith before your children.

God tells us how the home ought to be. If we go by our ideas, Dr. Spock's ideas, Dr. Ruth's ideas, we'll have problems. We are taught in the Theology of the Body that the family is patterned after the Trinity. The Father loves the Son and pours all He has into the Son. The Son loves the Father and pours all He has into the Father. The Love between them is so dynamic, It is the Power of the Holy Spirit. Likewise, the husband loves his wife and pours all he has into her. The wife loves her husband and pours all she has into him. The love between them is so dynamic, the product is children.

God's plan is in Ephesians 5. Some highlights are "Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ." "Wives, be subject to your husbands." (Mr. Jones pointed out, "Let him be a man; that's all that means.") "Husbands, love your wives."

Mr. Jones encouraged, "Parents, YOU be devout." Let your children see you praying at home, reading at home, worshipping at home, having family prayer, loving one another, embracing one another, arguing and resolving problems while still loving one another.

Forgive your children when they do wrong. Love them no matter what they do

 

How did Mr. and Mrs. Jones do this while they raised their boys in a terrible inner-city neighborhood? They determined to love one another and they determined to make a Godly home. Some things were just not allowed, such as music having lyrics that violated Christian morality and coming home drunk. The kids didn't always like the rules. When the parents were confronted with, "But so-and-so does it," the response was "They don't know God. We do so we don't do that."

Check out your children's friends carefully. Let them know that you'll always love them, always be there, never let go of them, never give up on them, and always forgive them.

Mr. Jones shared with us about the struggles his and his wife had with one of their sons. This son became involved in drinking, crack, crime, etc. He lived in a crackhouse. He was arrested twice. He would go out and not come home at night. Through it all, his parents continued to love him and reach out to him. Finally, he turned around and is now happily married with children. This son was one of the first to convert to Catholicism with his father. He told his father that he didn't understand everything about Catholicism, but he knew that his father had never led him astray before and he knew that he could trust his father's word.

What we do and what we are speaks volumes to our children. They see and learn God thru us.

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